Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
