; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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