Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
