the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
