This is not my ceiling
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
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