And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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