told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
