How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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