There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
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