Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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