You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Randomize
