okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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