Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
