Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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