I think I just saw someone hide a body.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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