She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
