so explain again why im purple
no
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Randomize
