didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
