I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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