If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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