sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
In other news, I just burned my penis
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person