Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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