my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
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