Me. At least after what I've been through.
worst night to have a conscience
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
