420 ftw
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
