Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Randomize