i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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