he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize