hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
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