Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
