..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Randomize
