He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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