I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Randomize