I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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