You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize