I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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