Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize
