So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
