so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
