She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
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And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
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The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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