Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
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