So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
