I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
