does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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