Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
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