Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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