dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Just pee around me
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon