we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize
