Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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