so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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